The tanning culture...

This is odd. I'm ashamed to admit this. Fuck it.

I have been tanning for the past three weeks.

I'm not proud of this. I've never done it before, but I needed to for this trip to Aruba (another reason to not want to go....damn it for emasculating me) so I wouldn't burn.

Tanning parlors are such unusual places. Old wrinkly men work there with old wrinkly women. Young smoking hot chicks who were probably fetuses when I was in high school come in wearing practically nothing.

EVERYONE is tan. Makes me wonder why they are going if they are already tan. Dudes show up. They are so excited about tanning. They walk in with their tanning lotion.

These dudes are talking to the other regulars. Talking about how the stand up one is the best, it gets them all over. The women they are talking to nod seriously and say "Yeah you need to stand up one."

Like they are discussing a cure for cancer.

I don't need an all over tan. I just need to not get burned under that fucking sun. I have a session today and tomorrow and then I am done forever.

I don't fit in with this crazy mixed up tanning culture. I just go in...rock out on the ipod for 10 minutes and get the fuck out. I feel so dirty when I leave. Even though the place is clean...people lay in those beds naked.

I don't know what else to say about it, but I feel very strongly about this. I mean if it wasn't for the hot chicks there, it would be more gay than it is. Maybe that does make it more gay. I mean a lot of gay dudes hang out with smoking hot chicks.

Why do the wrinkly old tan guys remind me of child molesters? Actually the guys my age who go so much that they know that the stand up tanner is the best remind me of child molesters too.

Those smoking hot girls are probably teenagers.....hmm.


I think every dude except me who goes tanning is a child molester.

I think I just used the transistive theory in algebra on tanning.

Go me.