Umm Happy Birthday....?

Kat walks into the office around 8 AM yesterday wearing a tight black shirt with writing on it.
I look at it and of course its in huge letters right around the new cans.

"Spank me, it's my birthday!"

Again, I am far from prudish, but what the fuck is this chick doing wearing a shirt like this? This is a shirt you see chicks wearing when they hit the bars in Boston. Dudes would buy them shots and they would just get plastered.

You don't wear it to fucking work. It just astounds me. Who fucking does that? I just say "Nice shirt." She laughs and bends over like I'm supposed to spank her.

I go "How about a happy birthday instead?"

This place is nuts. My buddy Tim shows up a little later and notices the shirt. He also notices her cancer tatoo on her wrist. She sees Tim looking at it and assures him that its not 69.

Thanks for clearing that up Kat.

My boss is on vacation. He has been since last week and will be back Monday. There are three people in my group and one of them is on vacation. The other person in my group decided to work from home all of this week. She didn't ask my boss because he is on vacation, so she just decided to do it.

Convenient huh?

My co-workers can blow me.

They are always bitching about how no one is around, but as soon as my boss is gone it's like school is fucking out. When my boss is here they go behind each others back and complain about no one working as hard as they are.

I'm live and let live, I don't bitch to my boss about any of them. I don't care what they fucking do, but at the same time it blows my mind that the people who do the most bitching are the ones taking the most advantage.

Know why this chick is staying home all week? Her boyfriends 16 yr old daughter is spending the week with them.

This girl used to live with them, then she caught a case of the teen pregnancy and this chick told her boyfriend that his daughter could not have a baby at their house.

This chick decided to move to North Carolina to be with her mom and have the baby. When the kid was born my co-worker was acting like a proud grandma showing pictures.

You never would know she told the girl to either get rid of the baby or put it up for adoption.
Now she is "working from home" all week to spend time with said baby.

Fucking hypocrite.